Holy good fucking god im depressed. I was going to break up with kyle tonight but he was stillmhigh from earlier so i couldnt talk to him. And im stuck using my ipod for internet and texting which sucks but theres like, only one person who would want to talk to me, and i to her...

Blaaarrr

No.



I'm very tired. And slightly confused.




I take that back. I'm very tired and very confused.

right after i posted my entry yesterday, i went to put my chickens outside and found one of them dead.

i have absolutely no money. at all. anywhere. like, a few coins in the car piggy. i dont even have a fully stamped coffee card.

i am so exhausted. i haven't had much work lately, but my divorce is taking forever and they want me to show up to court in ENGLAND. ok, sure.

i am enjoying the friends i have been making here in A-land, and tonight, right this moment im expected to show up to a fiesta. not hungry, cant bring taquilla, want to get drunk, wish i had enough gas to take unofficial boyfriend person to get stoned, make out gratuitously and then wallow in his lap.

it's easier to get high now. i don't feel quite as paranoid about how stupid i sound when i talk. everyone sounds stupid, lol.

also yesterday i ripped out the head and spine of said rotting rat and placed it on top of the chicken run so it can dry out. it made kyle actually want to throw up. i dont blame him - if i was still 18 i probably would have never talked to the person i saw do that ever again.

i feel extremely depressed about loosing aletha, and i want to cry and i almost cried when i buried her but i didnt. i put her in some dirt and put four different ajuga flowers over her, because they are dark purple and she was black.

my mom and dad both keep telling me they want to talk to me but they never do, and my sister has borrowed more than my last paycheck was worth.

im getting really sad again...

i do not feel like returning to the internet any time soon.

I haven't drawn anything in a while. Like, a week and a half? Two weeks? Weird. Been taking photos and hanging out with friends a lot lately. YAY SPRING TIMEEEE!

I suddenly want to REALLY BADLY. So... gonna go do that. And possibly put my chickens outside all day ]3

There's a rotten rat next to the chicken coop. I wonder if I could get it's bones somehow.

I always knew I was a pieces. Humanity fails.

Last night Bran said I was pretty. Geheheheheheh.

Made some awesome orange brownies today as an experiment for extra delicious and special brownies for next week. WHICH MIGHT NOT HAPPEN BECAUSE OF THE COAST LINE SAYING NO. Arg fuck that. Im gonna go anyway. I have to. I need to drench myself in below freezing Oregon ocean water.

Rng.. Ehn... Grkk. It's funny how my cross-overs get so much attention. Nothing I draw is any good. People should shut up. I'm bitter.

I'm gonna go draw a comic short and get high. Or vise versa. fuckyeahhhhh.

Dear diary,

I'm a dick.

:)

The end.

ha, thats what I always do when I find a new perfect song.





arg fuck. the narcissism is gone. im all depressed and shit. gonna go die for a while.

ahhh yes. I feel like me again.

ever so slightly evil and witchy. kind, conscious and paced. but still somewhat impromptu and deliberate.

mostly kind of sneering, grinning and blowing smoke from my nostrils as I reel in another one with my mask.

Ooohhh me.

Will. ahahahaaaa

i feel sick.